Most Absurdly Singaporean Things To Happen In August

By Sylvia Lew

August 31, 2017

Our small, quaint little island is no stranger to its own local quirks and kinks. Here’s a roundup of the most ridiculous, absurd or crazy things that happened in Singapore over the past month.

1. Middle finger during NDP

Not all heroes wear capes…or need adult supervision. The boy who was caught on national television broadcasting his middle finger for all patriots to see was both lauded and criticised for his behaviour.

Video credits: YouTube user VGK96 Jumpstyle

The Henry Park Primary student has released an official apology through a public statement from his school principal and has been counselled to rectify his ‘problematic’ behaviour.

Personally, I loved it. It added personality to the somewhat drab and repetitive NDP and gave us uptight Singaporeans a good chuckle. What a hero.

He’ll get the chance to learn the benefits of censorship when he grows up. After all, life will have a way of breaking your free spirit. Let that finger fly, I say!

2. Joseph Schooling apologises to Malaysia

News outlets ought to learn “a thing or two” about the consequences of taking quotes out of context! Singapore’s own Olympic golden-boy Joseph Schooling has since apologised twice after a quote he made with local media was taken out of context and framed in a manner that offended Malaysians.

Here’s what Joseph Isaac Schooling thinks of Singapore’s chances in the pool for Kuala Lumpur 2017.

Posted by Channel NewsAsia on Tuesday, 1 August 2017

Video credits: Channel NewsAsia

His innocent statement of bringing the young Singaporean SEA Games team to Malaysia to gain competitive experience was misinterpreted to suggest that Schooling wanted to…school Malaysia in some swim moves. Malaysia’s Sports Minister Khairy Jamaluddin has graciously warned Malaysians to not jeer at Schooling during the SEA Games because of this incident.

I can’t help but admire Schooling for his grace and patience in handling the matter. He avoided being defensive and while delivering a sincere apology. We still love you, Joseph! (Marry me!!!!)

3. Malaysian football fans chant slurs at SG team at SEA Games

Malaysian football fans could learn a thing or two from Schooling’s grace! Fans at the SEA Games football match between Malaysia and Singapore began chanting “Singapore dogs” in Malay, jibing at Singaporean players during the game.

Video credits: World of Buzz

The Malaysia Organizing Committee have since condemned this behaviour and released a statement warning fans to improve their sportsmanship.

C’mon guys, you know that sometimes we catch no ball but don’t compare us to dogs!

4. Weepy repentance video from couple charged over verbal/physical assault

The notorious couple that was caught on camera shouting at an old man at Toa Payoh hawker centre over a seating issue has been charged with counts of public nuisance, criminal force and harassment.

Over this verdict, a weepy video has surfaced with the couple publicly apologising to the old man regarding their behaviours.

Video credits: TODAYonline

Er… We’ll leave it to you to find those crocodile tears, cause I ain’t buying any of it.

Ms Tay was seen defending her actions using the stress of taking care of her sickly grandmother as an excuse, and giving a long, mopey ‘awards acceptance’ speech thanking her friends, family and lawyer.

Mr Chow’s apology seemed much more sincere as he stated that he had “no excuse for [his] behaviour” and that even he was disgusted with himself after watching the video.

Lesson learned: treat your elders right, or the Internet will get you!

5. Singapore Naruto Run at Vivocity a success?

Judging from the 3,600+ people interested in the event on Facebook, it’s safe to say the event was a success!

Videos and photos from the Naruto Run event shows avid Naruto fans (or just people with a great sense of humour) attending the event at Vivocity, running ninja-style through its rooftop boardwalk area with a soundtrack to match.

Believe it.

Posted by Jaze Phua on Saturday, 26 August 2017

Singapore Naruto Run 2017

It actually happened! #BelieveItJoin me next year @ Singapore Naruto Run at VivocityYou'll know it when Konoha needs you.Do Like & Share!Watch more from JazePhua 潘家偉

Posted by Jaze Phua 潘家威 on Sunday, 27 August 2017

Credits: Jaze Phua

Across the world, Naruto Run events are actually quite commonplace in school campuses or weeb-communities in America. With such a global fanbase, we’re honestly not surprised.

For the record, you guys aren’t doing it right! Your arms gotta be stiff and your body leaning forward more! Do it right like a real ninja.

6. Man drives car into water at Sentosa Cove

36-year-old man arrested after driving into water at Sentosa Cove

Video circulating widely on WhatsApp shows the moment a man drove a car into the sea at Sentosa Cove earlier today.

Posted by Channel NewsAsia on Friday, 25 August 2017

This guy is taking carpooling to a whole new level.

A 36-year old man was filmed driving his white MPV into the waters of Sentosa Cove Ocean Drive while being pursued by Sentosa Rangers. The driver has been charged for committing a Rash Act Causing Hurt and Criminal Trespass.

The 6 heroes who leapt to the driver’s help have been awarded the SCDF Community Lifesaver Awards. In particular, Mr David Roberts was hailed as a ‘superhero’ for being the first to leap into the waters, breaking the car window and pulling the driver out.

Photo credits: Channel NewsAsia

Rumours are that the driver spoke of “mermaids” that whispered instructions into his ear to drive into the waters. I can already predict his defence in court: “They mer-made me do it!”

7. Caucasian cyclist flips off driver after narrowly avoiding an accident

https://www.facebook.com/allsgstuff/videos/2508232295984151/

Video credits: All Singapore Stuff

A Caucasian female cyclist on a rental bicycle was caught on camera flipping off a female driver who narrowly avoided hitting her with her car near Katong Shopping Centre. The cyclist, clearly in the wrong here as the pedestrian crossing is red, aggressively pointed the middle finger at the driver who had to jam-brake at the cyclist’s reckless action.

With the rise of several rental bicycle companies across Singapore, it may be likely that we see more of such reckless incidents occur.

Singaporeans, please watch out! We’re still a long way to go to building a bike-friendly culture in our country.

8. Incense paper offerings strewn all over during Hungry Ghost Festival

Ah, it’s that time of the year again for Singaporeans. Not durian season, not the haze, but the notorious Hungry Ghost Festival. Photos of incense paper strewn over the floor in public have surfaced, with netizens criticising this practice as littering instead of praying.

Photo credits: Mothership.sg

According to my mother (lol), the practice of throwing joss paper in the air may be specific to certain dialects or religious subgroups. However, it still makes more sense to me that my ancestors will get their hell money by burning the paper instead of throwing them in the air!

Keep the environment and your neighbours in mind, folks. Spare more thought for the living than the dead!